A Time to Die
by Tears of a Spirit
Summary: There will come a time to die, when words left unsaid will fall on deaf ears, feelings left to wither, and tears to fall on graves. No one is invincible and Mikasa knows this better than anyone. But that didn't make the pain hurt any less. [Eren/Mikasa]


**A Time to Die**

By **Tears of a Spirit** (formerly Starstryker97)

* * *

A lone woman sat at a grave, her neck wrapped in a red scarf. For the first time in years, Mikasa Ackerman wept openly, clutching the scarf to her heart. The scarf hardly offered her comfort nowadays. What was once a gift that provided warmth and a feeling that was so unmistakably home, was now a weight upon her soul. There were times that she wanted to rip it off and throw it off a cliff, or into a fire. But each time she tried and she felt the fabric against her hand, she knew that she couldn't. She couldn't bear to part ways with something that had become a reminder of their time together.

Every single detail of him was ingrained within her mind as she reached out to brush the name on the headstone. She imagined he was there next to her, holding her hand like they did so often when they were little and telling her that everything will be alright.

_Eren Yeager_

_Warrior, Friend, Brother_

But to her he was so much more. He was a guardian. An unlikely hero.

The love of her life.

She regretted that she couldn't tell him. Mikasa saw the grief that unspoken words could have on a person. She saw how crushed Levi was after Petra's death. But like a good leader, he put on a blank face and charged on. And she respected him for that. But she sees his mask slip, revealing the pain and anguish beneath when he thinks no one is looking.

She wondered if that was how she looked in the eyes of her friends. Was that really what she had become? An emotionless shell of who she once was?

Mikasa hugged her scarf even tighter to herself and buried her face in its folds and hopes that when she looks up, everything will be alright and Eren would be sitting next to her and she would be in his warm embrace. But deep down, she always knew that it was hopeful thinking.

Armin tried to comfort her. He took her to see places beyond the old walls. She saw the frozen earth, and the endless blue of the oceans, and the fields of snow with him. But all she saw was grey. The color had drained from her world.

Jean tried to convince her to move on, to live a life again. That she still had many people that cared for her, that loved her. Of course, mainly him. Mikasa could have laughed had she the feeling to do so. Jean could not fill the void left behind by the one person to ever occupy that space, even if he tried his damnedest.

But she no longer had her anchor, the one person that kept her sane in the chaotic and bloody era of the Titans.

She had already nearly lost him, when he saved Armin from the Titan and had gotten swallowed himself. When she found Armin, huddled in a ball and crying, she knew that something had happened. And when she found out, it was like someone dropped a lead ball in her stomach. She lost her cool then, but managed to keep it all under the surface. But when she saw him emerge from the steaming body of the supposed deviant Titan, she was overcome with emotions and everything just burst.

She thought about Ian, and how close to the truth he had been during the resealing of Trost. She tried to convince herself that the blush coloring her cheeks had been from the heat and the butterflies that decided to swarm her stomach had been due to the intensity of the situation.

She couldn't have been more wrong. Eren, with all his anger yet compassionate spirit and with his brash and impulsive nature, had become more than her brother. Mikasa didn't know how it all started, but once it did it was like a runaway train. Her feelings were constantly straining with each other, threatening to tear through her legendary composure whenever he was around.

Then there was the "Female Titan Fiasco". Many good soldiers died; including the Special Ops Squad Levi had assembled. Eren was taken. For what purpose, she didn't know. And frankly, she didn't care. All she knew what that she had to get him back. When Levi grabbed Eren from the she-demon that was Annie, she couldn't contain a small smile for the rest of the day.

But all of that was gone now. There were no more Titans. There was no need for vengeance. There was no Eren.

He had saved her in the waning days of the war and she couldn't do anything but watch helplessly as Eren flung her out and took her place in the maw of a Titan. She remembers the crunch of bone, the spray of blood, and the startling green eyes as they looked at her tenderly for the last time before they disappeared behind a set of bloodstained teeth. She would always remember that gaze. The next few hours became a blur. Some told her she became anger incarnate, killing Titans with deadly grace. Others say she screamed and killed every single Titan in that village. Depending on who she talked to, the story was always different.

But no matter what she did that day, Eren was gone. Mikasa reached out to brush the name on the headstone again and sighed as a warm breeze picked up around her. Tears leaked freely from her eyes.

"Eren… there was still so much I wanted to tell you… but I'll be joining you soon enough." She gasped out.

She sat in front of the headstone until the sun began to set, turning the grave into a sun washed oasis. Mikasa smiled bitterly as the breeze continued to blow. But she heard a single voice carried upon the wind.

"I know, Mikasa. I know. I love you too."

Mikasa looked skyward and let the sun warm her face. There comes a time for all of us to die. But for now she would live, and let him see the world through her eyes. And because the ones who truly love us, never truly leave us.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed it. I'm just in a depressed mood, hence the two angst stories in a week. And if you liked this little story, check out my other one: The Ties that Bind.

-Tears of a Spirit


End file.
